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GREEN BAY, WI - "I can't walk away from Football," said a teary-eyed Brett Favre at a press conference, "I'm a God."

Among rumors that he might hang up his cleats, Favre decided that he was just too adored to go anywhere.  "There are still people calling me the greatest ever.  And really, what have I accomplished that Doug Williams didn't do?"

Favre's one superbowl victory, countless upsets in the playoffs and more interceptions than any quarterback should really ever throw all seem to be forgiven by adoring fans.  Broadcasters sign his praises and networks battle to televise his games.

"Hey, next year I can continue to suck, and no one will care.  I'm not giving that up for anything.  What a sweet deal!"

"I would have his baby!" said Madison resident Gertrude Burns.  "It really doesn't matter to me that he throws the ball up for grabs in overtime in the playoffs.  It was everyone's fault but his."

Interestingly enough, University of Wisconsin Psychology Professor Charles Irwin claims to have found a genetic defect in Packer fans similar to the one found in Bush voters.  "They seem to not be capable of finding fault where it clearly exists," claims Irwin.  "I mean, weapons of mass destruction, really dumb interceptions...it's very similar with no accountability."

Pharmaceutical company Johnson and Johnson is working hard to reproduce the chemical reaction that occurs in these individuals.  They are banking on making millions in the 2008 elections.

"It's not just stupidity...it's apparently genetic," said Irwin.

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