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Oakland, CA - In a move that has surprised everyone, Al Davis has acquired the rights to troubled wide receiver Randy Moss in exchange for 3 of Oakland's toughest street gangs.

Moss will be the new starting wide receiver for the Raiders opposite Jerry Porter who recently signed a new contract with the Raiders.  In exchange, Minnesota will get something they badly need: street hoodlums. 

Mostly White Bread Minnesotans have been seriously lacking in street crime and youth-oriented out of control behavior.  Urban Oakland is mostly made up of street gangs. This trade evens things out a bit.

"We're very excited", said Raiders owner Al Davis.  "Sure we hate to lose some fans, but they'd all be in jail or dead in a few years anyway.  Plus Randy brings something to the table as both a receiver and thug.  Great trade for us."

Although Viking's head Coach Mike Tice was unavailable for comment.  He issued a statement through a Viking's publicists.  "...Upon hearing of this trade, Coach Tice said, 'What the %^&^!?!'"

Oakland's 'Los Diablo's' are headed to Minnesota

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