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NEW YORK, NY - Yankees Owner George Steinbrenner announced on Monday that the Yankee organization will open up what he is calling a 'Pharm' Team.

In this case, Pharm is short for Pharmaceuticals.  Instead of abiding the league policies on steroid use, the Yanks have decided to simply build better drugs.

"In the long run, this will be less expensive," explained Steinbrenner.  "We'll be able to manufacture our own undetectable steroids for mediocre players so we won't have to pay big salaries up front."

"We can offset other costs by selling to kids looking to play high school football or basketball.  no baseball though.  We don't like to compete.  After all, we're Yankees."

Steinbrenner went on to announce the operating name of the Pharm team will be Smith, Kline and Mattingly.  Although Steinbrenner announced that Billy Martin was approached to manage this team, Martin will probably decline the offer as he is deceased.

Pictured: Yankee scientist building a better relief pitcher

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